sick.

my mother is sick
and so am i
for whatever she is
i am too

my mother is sick
she slaps herself
i watch her violent palm
hit her face

again and again
she knocks her head
her eyes shut tight
her tears escape

she screams a little
and slaps too hard
and i hear the red blood
swelling up in her face

her throat is stuffed closed
is forced open again
is constricted
is deconstructed

her hair is a mess
comes unclipped
is shaken loose
then knotted and tangled

twice a week
she strangles herself
i watch her do it
and sometimes

i even help
my mother get sick
i blow some words
to push her fists

she's made me
she makes me
feel her sick
so that one day

maybe today
i'll make myself sick.