come.

it does not matter if we take a walk
on the bed of spilling skies
if the clouds just roll on by
we can sit on the grass
and listen to our whispers
lie

take a blade between your hands
blow and hear it scream
like a duck brought to slaughter
in the room where echoes live
haunting corpses composed of dust
blow and hear them scream
do not touch me
i am old

when you come to this place
clouds roll on
sheets slipping off the bed
as if i never left
as if you never said
"let us
go then
you and i"

down where?
they all go down there
the same route left and right
some take longer
and some disappear
some last for one night
and some never come
some never leave
and some never wait

and what if?
can i take you with me
up to nowhere?
and what if?
can we just wander
and walk and watch
the clouds roll on?
will you come
if i have no wine
if i have no smoke
if i have nothing
but this bed here?
will you come
if i have nothing
but this bed here?

old age.

you touch and go
forgetting you
remembering is
hard at this age.

you gave up on them
a little too soon
memory of memories
who tried to say

look at me
do not let slip
who i am
who am i?

look at me
do not be blind
i am you
and who are you?

unfortunately,
ears do not wait
to hear
or be heard

life is unknown
until you leave
babies and funerals
trees that weep

circles go round
strings unwind
looping music
looping years

orbiting in a vacuum
surrounded by fire
water and ice
dusts of time

who can live
in this space
who can play
in this box

and did i pay
for my way in?
and will i pay
for my way out?

and what if
they had not kissed
had not loved
had not hated

me, look at me
who am i
you, look at you
who are you

when i cannot hear
the ringing sounds,
round and again
miss my wake,

wind that cries
almost never
never dies
dies.

in heaven, in hell.

will be happy
will be scared
will be will be
the day you cared

have a drink
sweet apple juice
have a sip
feel the noose

tighten
lightened
of this
this heavy burden

hells bow down
to your words
queen inexperienced
queen of desire

won't you won't you
stay right here
won't you won't you
keep me safe

you hear him say
in this hell
i love i love
all of you

and in heaven
past lovers frown
recalling empty
once and forevers.

conscious.

conscious 
of the fact that
i have all this
and more.

i know you are
conscious
but i
am more
conscious.

conscious
of this extra skin
this extra flesh
these extra extra
extra pounds
or kilos
or ounces
or wafer lights.

conscious
of this extra 
extra extra
top of the morning
to you
to you
news of extra
extra extra.

conscious
of this extra
extra extra
all the love
all the money
all the water
a third world
hopes for 
extra extra
all in my hand.

conscious 
of this extra
extra extra
guilty guilt
all the privilege
and throwaway
pennies and wishes
on the floor
unwanted
unseen.

extra
conscious
skin
pound
money water
love and guilt
forgotten wishes
on the floor,
melted together
under my nose
like a rain puddle
dead leaves and dust.